Saturday 2 November 2013

High or low road


Here's the sitch this week. My friend got in an argument with his brother. A silly argument turned into a bigger one.  Both of them brought up situations in the past to hold against one another. This argument quickly became the kind where each party walks away because they can't take it anymore. Each too stubborn to come back and apologize. You know the kind of arguments I'm talking about.

It's really difficult to decide which arguments are the ones worth winning and the ones that aren't. How can you tell? When is it worth it? When do you try to talking it out instead of walking away - When is it better to take the high road and let them have the last word -

I told my friend he needs to take the high road. Be the bigger person and sit down one on one with his brother and outline a list of things that bothered him. This relationship is one worth the struggle. The key is to talk honestly without attacking. The harsh reality is that not everyone will see things your way. Your logic may not coincide with someones else's.

In order to take the high road you must first understand why the other person is reacting a certain way. Understanding the other person's perspective is half the battle. Then you need to control your actions sometimes a look or a certain tone can make the situation worse. Taking into account the merits of both sides you must accept your differences. Afterwards you need to slow down and carefully construct your next move. Your next move should be one that helps the other party and mend your relationship. It's difficult to be nice to someone who things your wrong but....killing them with kindness is always your best defence.

I truly believe honesty and communication can solve any relationship problem. Most arguments are out of some form of miscommunication, whether that's through text or maybe the other person isn't sharing the whole truth. As I said understanding each other and the different points of view is half the battle. If you think the relationship is worth it then make sure you spread the love. In the long road taking the high road, the one less travelled, you aren't making the situation worse. If the other party continually decides to take the low and bumpy road then karma usually takes its toll. By taking the high road you lower your stress and your reputation is better. Remember this next time you are filled with anger, take a step back and think of all the ways you can improve the situation. Is it a coffee date at Starbucks? Is it visiting them at work with a smoothie? Or is it sending them a lovely card in the mail. Everyone likes good mail.

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